"God is our refuge and
strength, a very present help in trouble." -- Psalm 46:1
experienced losing two people very close to her right around the time
she began high school. Her uncle committed suicide and then her grandfather
died. Around that time, a friend told her that her legs were big, so she
began cutting back on food. She gradually lost weight. Kristy was experiencing
turmoil on the inside but she seemed to have it all together on the outside.
She excelled in school.
a twin, which complicated matters. When her mother was pregnant she didn't
know she was going to have twins. Kristy, the second born always thought
she wasn't wanted, and that her mom loved her twin more. She was afraid
to express her true personality because it was different from her twin's.
Kristy believed that her family would only love and accept her if she
was like her sister. Of course this wasn't the case, but not in Kristy's
mind. So she focused on food and weight loss to ignore the feelings of
depression and rejection.
began to notice her extreme weight loss. Kristy longed for attention from
her parents but now that she had it, she didn't want it. The more weight
we lost, the worst she felt. The diet that began as a way to feel better
about herself had turned into a monster that drained all her energy. Three
years after she began her 'diet' she was admitted to a public hospital
weighing 70 pounds. She was in the hospital for 3-1/2 months. She gained
weight but her thought processes remained exactly the same. As soon as
Kristy went home, she returned to the exact same eating patterns as before.
later kristy was readmitted to the same hospital weighing 75 pounds. Her
health was in grave danger. She was required to eat everything put in
front of her, even foods she was afraid of. And she was punished if she
didn't follow the protocol. The staff never addressed her emotional or
spiritual needs -- they only fed her physical body. No one helped her
conquer her fear of food or helped her process why she began dieting in
the first place - they only focused on her gaining weight. She felt like
they were saying, "Fatten her up and kick her out".
self-hate consumed her, and when she left the hospital she immediately
began starving herself all over again. But her family could not afford
to send her to a private hospital specialized in ED, so what were they
to do? Her sisters were angry at her for doing this. She didn't know why
she did it either - all she knew is that she was not capable of stopping
the destructive behavior on her own.
found Mercy and she made
the trip, weak and emaciated. When she got there, every area of her life
was gripped by fear. She would cry after eating. A breakthrough came when
she "chose" to eat. She decided not to starve herself any more.
She finally realized that she needed to obey God and do the right thing,
regardless of what her feelings and emotions were saying. She asked for
forgiveness, and the power of sin in her life was broken.
It was during
the times of failure that Kristy learned what it means to run to God and
receive His mercy in her time of need. She also learned that God is a
very present help in times of trouble. "For we do not have a high
priest who is unable to sympathize without weaknesses, but we have one
who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin."
-- Hebrew 4:14-15.
her family members and admitted to perceiving 'correction' as rejection.
These emotions were grounded in a desire to continually please everyone.
She had to begin seeking to please God rather than pleasing others. She
prayed and placed her dependence on God, submitting to His timetable,
and relinquishing the reigns of her life to God, giving Him complete control.
She began to understand the importance of speaking the truth to others
in love so that positive choices and changes could be made.
a phenomenal breakthrough in which God truly changed her. She was no longer
easily offended, attention-seeking, or overly emotional. She gained a
healthy amount of weight, and her attitude completely changed. She began
to seek God and know His plan for her future (Jeremiah 29:11). She is
now a completely different person. The eyes that were once dark, sunken,
and hollow, were now sparkling with life. Death was swallowed up in victory!